Idealist?

I'm a bit bored, and therefore feel the need to post again. I just watched the movie "Requiem for a Dream", which was a crazy movie. Of course, it made me think of my client that's in rehab currently...I can't seem to leave that stuff at work.

So, it seems like I want to talk about my job in the Social Sciences field. That's what my brain is gravitating towards anyway. I sometimes wonder how long I can stay in my job. As long as I can remember, I've wanted to "help people" who have messed up families like mine. Hopefully, I can help them before things get too messed up, and I can try to put it into some semblance of order for them...But its really hard sometimes. First of all, I'm expected to know about a ton of stuff. I need to know the welfare system, federal benefits qualifications, low income housing, rent assistance, energy assistance, WIC, tax breaks for the poor, crisis help, shelters, food banks, clothing banks, nutrition for children, job skills, disabilities, elderly assistance, veteran's assistance, pregnancy help, domestic violence assistance, legal aid, financial management and budgeting, interviewing/resume skills, health insurance, single parent needs, and the list goes on and on and on!

I know it is never wrong to show compassion and to care for others. However, I sometimes wonder how long I will be able to do this, genuinely. I already find myself doubting what some people tell me. Now, I should explain that I'm a very honest person. I hate lying, and try my hardest never to do it. And I'm by no means a "sheltered" individual - I've been exposed to most of what's out there. When people talk to me about their lives, how they've gotten to the point where they're at, I am inclined to believe them. I know people exaggerate, and some lie...But I decided when I started this job that that's on their conscience, not mine. I will do my best to help them based on what they tell me. I'm not stupid, and I usually know when I'm being lied to. THAT'S what I am afraid will get to me...I'm afraid I will become jaded, and begin to not believe the sad stories that I hear.

I don't think I will ever have a job in another field. I just have this burning desire to make things right for disenfranchised people. I get so frustrated when I see policies and procedures that are designed without prevention in mind -- these lead only to a self-perpetuating cycle of neediness. I don't understand how some people can live their everyday middle class lives without thinking of those in need. I can't stand it when people know only about what's going on in their lives... nothing about their neighbors, their family, their state, our nation, let alone the wide world. I hate how when people think "poor", they see a ghetto crack house. These narrow-minded views of the world really get to me. Its when I see people like this, that my flame gets renewed and I vow to never become one of them.

I never want to be satisified. I hope I am always in this line of work, trying to make a positive impact on the world. For me, it's the only way I can be truly happy. Seeing the direct effect of something I do on someone's life is amazing, and more addicting than any drug used in "Requiem". The work will never be done, and I'm so lucky to be a part of it. Am I an idealist? Of course...what other way is there to be?

http://www.idealist.org/

~Molly